I have suffered with my bowel all my life really; I had my 1st operation when I was 8 and had the same operation done twice more unsuccessfully. I have a medical condition called atonic bowel. I had a very bad time after an operation to peel a large cyst off my ovary that had stuck to my bowel and left me basically with a dormant bowel. I tried a lot of methods and medications but when clean prep was stopping to work, I knew I was in a bother. After the operation I spent 2 years in and out of hospital in persistent pain and vomiting. On May 20th 2018, I had to have an emergency Ileostomy. Although I was on the list to have elective surgery for a bag, I ended up having mine done as an emergency under Dr Prof Neary.

 

This is my story living with a stoma. Since having my Ileostomy bag my main issues is low blood pressure. I really have never looked back since having my surgery. I was losing weight just before my operation and continued to do so after it. However, I went on to become a Weight Watchers Coach, a job I absolutely love.
Before my bag I would not have been able to become a Weight Watchers Coach as I was quite sick. Now I am able to hold in person and virtual meetings.
Although not everyone will know I have an ileostomy bag it does not stop me in my everyday life. I am not the only person in my family to have a bag. My Son, who is 10 yrs old, has the same condition as myself and now has a bag. He having a bag at 10yrs of age ,20 years earlier than myself, which to me screams out the condition worsens through generations in my family. It was a tough decision to make as a mother to agree to give him an Ileostomy. As a mother you always want what is best and a miracle cure. But just like my story as all medical efforts were exhausted, I cried when I agreed for it to happen. Why I am not sure as I did know the life changing experience it was for me. He had his ostomy surgery done in December 2020 and this too has been a life changing experience for him.

My reason for joining the Ostomy Association was to show my son and other Ostomates that there is support available and that having an Ileostomy, Colostomy, Urostomy or Internal Pouch is not the end of the world, in fact in many cases it is only the beginning to be able to have a quality of life
again and to be able to live Life to the Full. I have probably taken more care of myself Physically & Emotionally since getting the bag.
I do not let too much phase me to be honest and I would like to show my son and others that life, can be successful with this invisible
disability. For me once I began to feel well again, I had other things to worry about like finding myself again outside of the hospital environment. I am no fashion guru, but I do like to feel I am dressed up so when I first got the bag I was completely overwhelmed when I started looking at what clothing I
could wear. I set up a page for to show ladies some clothes for Ostomates that are in fashion. It is called ######## on Instagram where I show clothes, and products to help us along the way.

Although I am a member of the Ostomy Association of Ireland, it is a little different for me as an Ostomate and also having a son who also is an Ostomate. I felt I knew no one who was also a parent of a child with a bag. I have since set up a group in which there are 12 Mammys with children with stomas around Ireland helping and supporting each other. This is very important to me as not all children will have a Mammy with an ostomy like my son has. While I now enjoy working, he now enjoys being able to be part of different groups such as coding and robotics and he absolutely loves swimming. Jamie Alcock from Vanilla Blush got him some swimming trunks and now he is like a fish in water. This is the first time in 10 years we are not on an admission list to be admitted to the hospital. That is a very nice feeling.

For my family having an ileostomy bag in both cases has given us life, it has taken us from a comfort zone of a hospital setting to find
out what we really love to do. It has given us independence and we no longer look at the stoma bag as a disability, but more as an ability to be able to do so many things we could not have dreamt of doing before now.
The world will be forever
our Oyster.

Take Care and Thanks

Notes

This article was first published in the Ostomy Irish News magazine, Issue 9, Autumn 2021

The author’s name and photo are being withheld until we receive permission to publish them online.

Although the Ostomy Association of Ireland may be mentioned in this article, it no longer exists.
You can find support through local groups instead — we’ve listed them here, and we update the list regularly.

If you’d like to share your story on Stoma.ie, please email it to info@stoma.ie.
Be sure to include your full name, address, and phone number.
If possible, please attach a photo as well.